Written by Jenne Todd, SHIFT Collective Nov 12, 2019
You know that goal you have always had? The one that gently taps you on the shoulder when you least expect it, or the one that speaks loudly when you’re frustrated or you’ve had a bad day at work?
Why aren’t you in hot pursuit of that goal?
For most of us it comes down to fear…but not just fear, fear of what others will think if we do take action and fail. It’s hard to allow others to see us fail, especially if they have expressed doubt in our ability in the first place.
I want you to position yourself at the end of your life, you’re surrounded by the people you love.
What are you thinking about? Are you running through the motion picture that is your life, reveling in the successes that were once things you had to muster up the courage to take a chance on or are you saddened with the feeling of regret, for not taking the chances when you could? Are you disappointed that you worried about what others might have thought of you? Were you a dreamer or a doer? Did you love those closest to you well or spend your days disconnected and busy?
Don’t let this happen.
We all fear what others will think, even those of us who say we don’t – I believe we all do on some level. That’s a normal part of the human experience. But do we let that fear stop us from pursing our goals and dreams?
The only difference between you and someone you look up to, someone who is following their call, is the fact that you both make mistakes (daily), but they keep getting back up, keep on pushing, keep on trying. They keep on accepting the mistakes & pursing the journey rather than throwing in the towel. That’s it. They keep on failing…until one day, they get it right.
I know you likely already know the “formula” to setting great goals…make them “SMART” (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic & timely)…so I’m not going to go there. We can know all the formulas in the world, but that doesn’t get you any closer to your goals.
I believe goals start with our ability to get out of our own way.
I said it. YOU are the problem…the reason you’re not attaining your goals.
But….great news! You are also the SOLUTION! (yay!)
Here is my take on goal-setting:
1. Acknowledge (OUT LOUD) to the people closest to you, what you want more than anything (shout your goals from the rooftop).
Tell your favourite aunt, your partner, bff, mom, dad, kids, the PTA, your son’s soccer coach, your restaurant server…tell them all. Blast it out on social media. Make a poster for your front door, write it on your mirror in lipstick…okay perhaps a bit overboard but you get the gist….TELL PEOPLE, say it out loud and OWN your goal! I promise, everything will change.
2. Make a plan on how you’re going to achieve it.
Do you need more time…more resources…help? You’ve already got it if you take inventory of your life.
Cancel Netflix, stop eating out, no more impulse shopping. Start saving your precious, hard-earned cash. Money is AMAZING, especially when you have a purpose for it. Need more time? Easy. Stop scrolling social media, watching tv and saying yes to everything that comes your way. Start monitoring the time you spend on your phone each day using an App, stop numbing a hard day with hours of tv/video games after work and stop assuming you are the only one who can run the fundraiser at the kids’ school…just because you’ve always done it doesn’t mean you are the only person capable.
Delegate, delegate, delegate.
Ask your kids/spouse for more help around the house, let go of tendencies of perfectionism. You get the idea…brainstorm all of this out and you’ll come up with so many solutions you won’t know where to start (lucky you!).
3. Don’t let failure stop you.
GET. BACK. UP. Every time you fail. And expect that you WILL fail. A lot.
Every time someone says you can’t do it remind yourself that THEY may not be able to do it – but YOU CAN! Can I get an Amen?! You CAN do the thing. You CAN learn new skills. You are be different than other people. You CAN make a massive difference. It’s all about mindset. Develop daily affirmations just like these to help get you to your goals.
Your family needs to see you succeed, even if that means spending time away from them to work on your mission. This is a healthy example to set and you’ll influence more people than you know.
You have got this and I know it.